We anonymously surveyed participants via women’s Facebook groups about love and relationships with the question, “Did you get a prenup? If you're not married, would you? Why or why not?” and then we picked through their answers, looking for trends and anonymized their responses. Here is what we found.

The main reason women get prenups

We received over 70 responses to our query; then, we went through the data on respondents who want to get or already have prenups in order to learn what motivated them. Here's what we found:

• Protecting Assets: The strongest motivator was the need to protect their assets or inheritances, with 33% of respondents mentioning this reason.
• Back-up Plan: 21% of the women who commented cited wanting to have a contingency plan just in case for that ‘what-if’ that no one plans on.
• Protecting their Hard Work: 11% focused on not wanting an ex-spouse to reap the benefits of their hard work.
• Protect Children: 9% wanted to protect assets specifically for their children or other family members.
• Financial Discrepancies: 7% felt that significant differences in the assets brought to the marriage by each party are the reasons for a prenup.
• Insurance: Interestingly, multiple respondents (5%) used insurance as a metaphor for a prenup, explaining that you don’t get health insurance because you plan to get sick; you get it on the off chance you might get sick; similarly, you don’t get a prenup because you plan to get divorced.
• Regret: Another 5% told stories of not having gotten a prenup in previous marriages and regretting it.
• Avoiding Divorce Conflict: Finally, a further (very insightful) 5% of respondents mentioned the importance of setting forth a contingency plan while the relationship is amicable because making the kinds of decisions laid out in prenups later, only if the relationship goes downhill, will likely result in worse outcomes for both spouses.

Individual women give more reasons for prenups

Here are some more insightful responses from real women:

• They worked for it, not their partner: If one’s partner was not in the picture while they were working hard to build their success, then a prenup should be arranged because those assets rightfully belong to the individual who earned them.
• Infidelity clauses: One participant would get a prenup specifically in order to include clauses defining and putting in place financial consequences for mistreatment (such as infidelity).
• True love is protecting each other: One person really grasped the point of prenups amazingly well when she said not that she would like a prenup to protect herself, but in order for her and her partner to protect each other.
• It's about fairness: Another respondent equated prenups and fairness, saying that getting a prenup is the fair thing to do.
• Protecting family money: One woman suggested a prenup specifically to protect her partner’s inheritance so that his family would know she had no intention of using him for his money.
• Wealth discrepancies: One commenter noted that they would only get a prenup if there were significant wealth differences between her and her spouse, citing a $5-$15k price tag for prenups.

We at HelloPrenup offer a sophisticated software that removes a lot of tension from the equation and helps you to write a prenup based on your specific financial situation for just $599 per couple, plus add-on attorney services at flat rates!

Direct quotes from women with prenups

Some commenters related personal anecdotes or brought up points that are best expressed in their own words. Here are a few of our favorite quotes from them about why they have or will get prenups in the future:

“Crazy that people think that getting a prenup is speaking divorce into existence. That’s like saying you won’t get car insurance because you’re throwing the possibility of a car accident into the universe. Car insurance won’t stop someone from rear ending you and [not having] a prenup won’t stop a divorce if the circumstances call for it. Just saying.”

“Yes. To protect each other in case of the worst in the future.”

“A prenuptial agreement is a contract that lays out what happens during the marriage AND in the event of a divorce. It’s not just about finances it can include anything you want.”

“It’s better to make these decisions when you like/love/care for one another bc should the relationship go south - attitudes change.”

“I didn’t the first time and we didn’t have anything, but during the divorce process I actually started making more money than him…and he came for half my business. Next marriage we are definitely doing prenups for sureee! Not going through that [mess] again!”

“Yes. Mandatory. — I’m a very cautious person… has nothing to do with my trust level.”

“I would get a prenup, because it’s there to protect you. First off, if I get sick it protects him from paying that debt if I die. Second[ly], if he gets sick I will at that time have a multi million dollar property inheritance and it will protect me from the government seizing it. Also prevents someone from marrying me just for a hunk of that property. Also, if he ends up maxing out credit cards and gets a gambling or shopping addiction I won’t be responsible for that debt at divorce or death. I don’t care about splitting my money, I only think about potential racked up debt and [whether] I want that debt to vanish, or if I want to pay it off.

Prenups don’t just protect your earnings, they protect you against your ex spouses acquired debts as well.”

“When we divorced, the IRS came after me for money he owed from BEFORE I even knew him.”

"As a divorce attorney, I highly recommend them. Do not allow the state to decide for you who gets what. In addition, they save marriages rather than promote divorce. The state gives huge financial incentives for a spouse to leave the marriage if things go wrong, especially if you’re successful. As women these days start to earn more than their husbands, more and more ex husbands are getting alimony and even child support which can be 40% of your wages before taxes. Not to mention the assets you loose.”

The bottom line

Of course, at the end of the day, every couple is unique, and only you and your partner can decide what is right for you. If you think you might be on the same page as us about premarital agreements, check out our interactive prenup platform that helps you and your fiance open up communication, put your plans down in writing, and customize your own prenuptial agreement, all for a fraction of the price you would pay a lawyer.